"very huan"

"how belittlg," the other chided bndly, "but perhaps that is what loss of blood does to one all honesty, i never expected you to go that far"

where's kenren, he wondered though he didn't bother to voice it "how far is far?"

"resortg to huan carelessness" the reply was autoatic and well prograd- urtesy of heaven's groog

"who's careless?"

"riskg your life for a subordateanyone, it reveals a dependence kai should be above feelg to debase yourself this anner" he was jt a voice

"it akes feel like yself perhaps debased y face rubbed the dirt, perhaps perhaps with the terror of feelg ortal" a irk of a sile lifted the sides of his lips shien uld feel it "i like it"

"you're nothg ore than a huan a god's body" nataku's soldier replied soberly, without the full knowledge of his words, before standg up and takg a seat by the closed he opened it a crack, lettg the ol night air waif side it ruffled the bnkets and the papers of nearby books hakkai was sure he had shelved earlier that day shien t have been here for a while

"oh, i thk y case is worse than that, but i' not very terested talkg about yself at the ont the soldiers"

shien was lookg out to the distance now " the barracks, probably dog as they please pyg on ost likely very anialistic, revoltg i hesitate to speak openly the urt about thissituation it is not y pce"

"this can't end well" hakkai said

"it is not y pce to thk of hoill all end i take orders fro nataku-saa who, i fear, ight not be capable of handlg the situation the farthest i go is rg you"

"so that i can end it"

"if you can"

this was nspiracy, if nothg else and if nothg else, he was absotely the wrong person for the job this was tenpou's field entirely, a an a trillion years wiser than hakkai was fitely ore skilled underhanded diploacy, and an fite other thgs that would ake way for an fite nuber of reasons why the healer should give a ft out: no, do your own dirty work it was a typically sanzo-ese reaction, yes, but the priest was, if nothg elseextrely practical and wise an alholic, cha-sokg, and sullen sort of way

but the thought of sanzo triggered other thgs hakkai's d ade hi thk of ray nights when the blonde would sit by the starg, jt like shien was dog noaitg for nothg, yet expectg everythg to iplode at any ont becae that was jt how he felt becae the ra did that and the ra did any thgs and the ra ade any thgs bee rebered even though they shouldn't be rebered and he rebered how hard it raed that night and how it paed hi so uch to hear it thunderg his ears like so onipotent doo that would first seduce hi then burn hi to ash kanan was ash burn, burned and then he noticed that it never seed that heaven would ever ever ever have ra becae heaven is perfect and heaven is nice, and heaven is peaceful and heaven is pletely oblivio of anythg that the huans would suffer down below apathetic heaven sweet and chargapatheticand jt for show stty heaven you deserve your share of heat

he sped hiself, jerked hiself fro that tra of thought as if he were forcg hiself out of an ipendg nightare before sleep had pletely taken over and he would be rendered helpless "that's not either" hakkai whispered, brgg his hand to touch the uncuffed ear he suddenly felt like a wolf sheep's clothg hungry like the rest of the "but stillhow can you get rid of the rotten pilrs of a pavilion without sendg the entire structure crashg down?"

"we'll salvage e can heaven tends to survive that way" shien sounded nonchant, as if by givg hakkai the responsibility, the sacrilege was off his chest "heaven itself is cidental break it right through the iddle i hold no ncern for it for i only serve nataku-saa and he is not of it"

and it reded hakkai of his university days

the noble huan beg does not s, the profound poet wants to tell : though every w, every natural order, even the oral world ay perish through his actions, his actions also produce a higher agical circle of effects which found a neorld on the rus of the old one that has been overthrown

- nietzsche "the birth of tragedy"

he never really thought about it too uch not until now but he wasn't noble kougaiji was noble yaone was noble pure hearts, he uld sense but never hiself nobility easily shifts to carelessness, givg no dication of the transforation until the fal deed is executed by that ti, it is already too te, the world destroyed